Where do I start?

Hello, I'm developing a product I thought of. As a part of it, I'm trying to figure out the best architecture for the product. It's a server application, what is supposed to serve A LOT of users at a time. Think of an IM application, but not web style, more like ICQ\MSN applications... With web orientation. I've read all about Meebo, Facebook Chat & etc architectures. But I'm still not sure where to start on ICQ style (this is the first phase before I go totally web). Can you direct me to some information on load balancing 10 million users? ;-) I just don't know here to begin... Thanks, Amit

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